Why This TikToker Thinks Women Should Have Two Boyfriends
- A TikToker made waves by suggesting women should have multiple partners to strengthen relationships.
- She also proposed that men form a "lobola stokvel" to save for wedding expenses together.
- While some agreed with her ideas, others stood firm in defending tradition.
So, here's a thought that's making waves online: What if monogamy isn't the answer? A TikTok user from South Africa dropped a bombshell when she suggested that women should consider having not one, but two boyfriends to improve their chances of finding long-term happiness. Let’s dive into this conversation and see what’s really going on.

The lady in question isn't just throwing ideas into the wind—she's challenging societal norms. She argues that instead of sticking to the traditional model of monogamy, women should explore polyandry, a concept where they can have more than one partner to meet different emotional and physical needs.
Why Monogamy Might Be Overrated, According to This TikToker
We've all heard excuses for cheating, but this TikToker takes it a step further. She believes the root of so many failed relationships lies in society’s rigid expectation of monogamy. In her viral video, she suggests that women should seriously consider having multiple partners to better fulfill their needs. And here's the kicker—she thinks men should also get creative with saving for weddings by forming a lobola stokvel.
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For those unfamiliar, a lobola stokvel is essentially a group savings plan where men pool their resources to help each other afford the traditional payment (lobola) made to a bride's family. According to her, this system could ease the financial burden on men while keeping relationships fair and balanced. Here's how she put it:
"The boyfriends could start a lobola stokvel to help each other cover the wedding costs when it's their turn to bring the uncles."
Her words didn't just spark curiosity—they ignited a heated debate. Many were shocked by her suggestion, as tradition has always been the bedrock of relationships in South Africa. However, she defended her stance, saying:
"I've been wanting to talk about this, but women do not want to let go of the status quo when it comes to relationships. I hope you guys hear me out."
If you're curious, check out the full video below:
What Mzansi Thinks About Polyandry
Not everyone was quick to jump on board with her ideas. Social media users had mixed reactions, with some praising her boldness while others criticized her approach.
@user6750439284027 wasn't shy about calling out the idea:
"You are running away from one thing: self-control. Always taking the easy way out. You are supposed to be lord over your body, not let it control you."
Meanwhile, @🦋Honeyboo🦋🇿🇦 found a silver lining in the idea:
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"That's why I have two boyfriends—double allowance!"
And @Celestial Being was ready to embrace the concept:
"I get her and agree with her 100%."
Others, like @Tlotlo, expressed practical concerns:
"I hear you, fully and wholeheartedly, but where do you guys find two, let alone one man worth dating?"
Even @Tholiwes makeup couldn't believe their ears:
"You almost gave me a heart attack."
@Lea_yarr countered with a strong argument against polygamy:
"Still, in polygamy, people cheat for more, but it's never enough. Monogamy was made to have self-control because polygamy promotes unfaithfulness and disloyalty; besides, treating STIs every day is the pits."
South African Women Weigh In on Polygamy
This TikToker's ideas might seem radical, but they're part of a larger conversation happening across South Africa. Briefly News recently highlighted another TikTok discussion where women shared their experiences in polygamous relationships. Kelebogile Chauke asked why some women accept or even allow their husbands to take on second wives and how these dynamics play out in real life.
The responses varied widely. Some women shared light-hearted stories, while others opened up about the emotional toll of sharing their partner. A few admitted that they eventually walked away from such arrangements altogether. It’s clear that navigating modern relationships isn't easy, and there's no one-size-fits-all solution.


